Just Something!

As I stood on the cross roads of life, there’s so much that went by.
I waited.
this waiting seemed like it would never end.

And now as I look forward, I see the fast approaching future!
it’s coming from all directions to get me.
the brim of it is so bright, it’s blinding me!
bright yet silent! This light has engulfed me so much so that.. now I feel lost.
like I am in the middle of nowhere. Everything looks like its frozen.
for me to look beneath the skin, to find what lies underneath of all that’s obvious!!

I am happy to move on..
But this happiness is overtaken with the fears of leaving behind all that I was holding on to!
for so long!
I had got so used to being treated like a pearl inside its sea shell.
Like a dew drop on a leaf blade.
Like the rainbows after any first shower.
Like any day’s first ray of sunshine.

There’s so much I want yet I don’t feel the need of it.
So much I want to tell.. that my own silence now seems deafening.
what do you call this state of life?
one where you want everything to stay as it was when you know it’s defi not possible, where you want things to change but you know they will not!

Life has it’s own ways but
if only, I could get a glimpse of what’s mine but is kept hidden from me.
if only, I could atleast hear people, of situations, and of places that ill go to!

as future conquers my soul the last thing on my mind is, where was I when I was conquered?? What is this place called? And if, there were other people who had come here before me, why didn’t they tell tales of its existence?

will I ever visit this place again?? Or will that be another crossroad with different directions leading to new destinations?

I don’t know of the place I am going to and I don’t know if I’ll ever meet the likeness of you!
but you know what? Sometime’s its better to let go and allow time to take you across the expanse of life!

Penned down for Burma [just another Muslim genocide]

Silence…..
I hear it all around me
they’ve come
they continue to come in large groups
their number is huge
while we are only a handful
many of us already dead
lying on the grounds waiting to be Laid

Now they are coming to get what’s left of us

Blood…..
My tongues got taste of it
my brothers head, I can’t find it
those wounds of my mother, nothing to hide with
my sisters smile, I keep searching for everywhere
My husband.. But where is he?
being his own self always, a possessive dad
he’s run away with our kids
I am sure they are safe and I don’t need to worry

Hiding….
and all alone
if I could, i would
I hear Abdur Rahman, pleading for me to play with him
”hide, mommy! And I will find you!!”
People hold me, some even push me away
I think they are all dead
”son, its time for bed”!
I whisper into nothingness

Fire….
I smell it from all corners,
”oh dear, have you burnt the dinner again??”
I hear him shout from the living area
”sorry, love” teary eyed
I wait for him to come to me
to tell me , he loves me anyway
I look out into darkness!

Swords and Flesh..
There are so many pieces of them
a movement.. “Hide!!” they scream.
”Oh, it’s a bird...”
Its come to eat my family
no, I hear it.. Its Abdul Kareem crying
Its time to feed him... Its time and he must be hungry
they hold me, they wont let me go to Abdul Kareem
he is but one , he cant even speak
”I am coming dear, please don’t cry!”
I run across nowhere

People
I see them, they look just like you
they don’t care either
they don’t hear a wailing Abdul kareem
they don’t see a scared Abdur Rahman
they wont take my husband into their country

Ya Allah! I have wronged myself
I had hope from those who’ve got nothing on me
but by God, I know there are few
far away sitting in their luxurious homes
but crying for a homeless, stranded me
and hoping, that one day I get to meet my family!